Manic Monday

While relaxing, sharing some mutual silence, I was asked, “What are you thinking about?”
Under normal circumstances (lie) I would have been contemplating the finer points of the Universe. But I replied, “The contents of a Monopoly game.”
And that was a true statement.

Everyone should wear hats and gloves more often. I do not mean baseball caps and fingerless motorcycle gloves. Where has elegance gone, oh where oh where can it be?
Maybe I just need to live further north.
Maybe I just need a time machine.

Worst Night Ever and Best Weekend Ever.
Life (sometimes) has a habit of kicking me squa in the fucking teeth. And then sometimes, right afterwards, it will lay me down on rose petals and kiss on my toes with satin lips.
Life can be a fickle fucking bitch.


Keanu Reeves is a tool but I still dig The Matrix.

All fruit has a window in which it must be eaten or it becomes disgusting. I don’t know if that window is only milliseconds long, or if I am blacking out, but I can’t seem to ever eat a piece of fruit. Its looks either too green or like it has been playing full contact football outside in the rain.

The face of my cell phone displays the time, numerical date and day (as Sunday, Monday, etc…). I noticed today that it does not include the month and I wonder why AT&T assumes I know what month it is.

My feet might not like 5 inch heels but my ass sure does.

I did not think the production 'The Phantom of the Opera' would have parts in it that were slightly humorous or that might make people laugh. Possibility 1: Not all operatic stars are created equally. Possibility 2: Orlando's Theatre crowd need more manners (this is a given - how dare one walk in to a performance late or talk for any reason - so unbelievably tacky). Possibility 3: Aliens.

Girl Scout cookies. What's the big fucking deal?


Love, love love my new haircut but the bits of red color are not as dramatic as I had expected. Maybe because I saw the stylist with light auburn highlights in her brown hair instead of the chick with the pink, green and blue bangs in her bleached blonde hair. Such is my hypothesis.

I am pretty sure I am having a secret love affair with corn. Maize. Yes, the yellow, kernel stuff that grows on stalks.

Zombies really freak me out. Any time I have watched a zombie movie and then watch a movie with no zombies right after, I watch the entire second film thinking at any moment zombies will come out. I cannot get near windows without thinking zombies might bust through if they see my shadow or if I make too much noise. I definitely can NOT go outside for the rest of the night.
This leads me to believe zombie movies are to be watched back to back only, minimizing my long term stress.

I did nothing to save the world this weekend; the world didn't try to save me either.
Even Stevens.