Happy Bloody Valentines Day

Dear Cupid,
You bastard.
There is an arrow sticking out of my ass and I am sure you are to blame.
All this time and you STILL haven't taken Archery 101? COME ON!

Dear Lonely Hearts Club Band,
Shut up. You rule like... 364 days of the year.

Dear Puppies and Flowers Crowd,
Don't make me fucking hurl today.
That was your warning.
I have an arrow and I am not afraid to use it.

Dear Chocolate,
I hate you so much.
Now, jump in my mouth.

Dear Friends,
If nothing else....
Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

Happy Bloody Valentines Day.

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