Manic Monday

  • Pool landscaping should never involve plants that molt.
  • All your steak are belong to us.
  • I have grown quite a fondness for olives with garlic cloves in the middle.
  • When wearing my invisible tiara, the need for explanation IS FUCKING NIL.
  • Underwear has purpose. Panties are for show. Pick your undergarments accordingly.
  • Cat hair wardrobe is what I want for Christmas, so I can stop de-furring my clothes.
  • One day, while emailing family, I am going to hit SEND only to realize I have accidently attached lesbian porn.
  • Fuck you, Don Henley is awesome.
  • Fish not included, your household should max out at one animal per bedroom, unless you consider dogs over 90lbs, in which case you should just stop being a dick.
  • I have more green sweaters than any other color sweater.
  • At my current rate of acquisition, I should have a penguin by the year 2389. Kicknuts.

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