[pulling car into driveway, very large, black bird impedes forward progression]
Me: Whoa, thats a big bird.
Kid A: Thats a crow, a sign of bad luck.
Me: No it isn't.
Kid A: Thats a raven, it means impending doom.
Me: No, it doesn't.
Kid A: It means bad omens are on the way.
Kid A: It means there is a curse being laid.
Kid A: It means total destruction is in our future.
Me: IT DOES NOT!!
Kid A: (to bird) You can kill me emotionally but in no other way.