Last night I got super paranoid and was forced to lie in bed, panicking in the dark. I had to lie to myself to bring about sleep (only 60% positive there was not an anaconda under my bed), which didn't help because I dreamt I was a hoarder, so when I woke up I was still panicking because there is nothing in the world scarier to me than being a hoarder. I am not sure if the reason is that I see the potential for it happening. Because I do. I am, a-scared.
I enjoy sticking garbage in those small sized bags you get from the grocery store combined with a hatred of taking the garbage out.
Also, I am gaining weight.
Last month I might have only cooked a smidgen of meals and was honestly considering using the microwave as storage for my new acrylic paints.
Score four and five.
The other day while shopping in Walmart (Six) I bought an angel figurine for no reason (Seven) and also had a strong craving for pork rinds (Eight) even though I have never eaten them.
I cannot find the cat (Nine) and figured a good solution to this was the purchase of another one (Ten).
I might be in danger of throwing some offspring in the trash if they didn't move around so much. I can't stand keeping things, in fact my personality is the first to go this morning, as it has been 24 hours and I haven't thrown anything away.
New Identity X: Cereal Killer bunny.
Get me some Golden Grahams before I shave your head.
I donated 10+ inches of hair to Locks of Love this weekend. It was my sixth time sending a ponytail in after whacking hard core into the mane of hair that took me 2 years to grow out for this purpose. On Saturday, in a reoccurring state of "she should probably be caged but we like to watch her bite things", I tried to convince my loved ones to get me scissors so that we could take it down to the scalp. Mostly I was kidding. Mostly.
But one day I am going to be around someone who is Pro me shaving my head (or drunk) and its gonna happen whether anyone is mentally prepared for it or not.
You just wait.
I have almost cut it all off in a Burger King bathroom before. And you thought those things were just places to get busy, snap.
I would like to purchase an Angora Rabbit fur wig, please.